ride report « bicycles can save the world

RIDE REPORT:Dog River Trail

Distance: Nothing crazy,somewhere between 12 and 14 miles (the app shows one thing,the app’s website shows another…typical)

This image doesn't really show you much of the terrain

Weather: Absof’inlutely insane! One of those days I had PNW blueballs for and dreamt about when hating life and my job in the Bay Area. 80s,blue skys,views of Hood on one side,Adams on the other. Seriously I think angels were trumpeting and playing the harp on the way up.

Short summary: Amazingly beautiful day on a fun trail with very few people around. Ran into three other people who were going down while I was working my way up.

The up: Just under 6 miles/2k feet to start the ride. Finely groomed singletrack with pockets of deep moon dust. Shrubs and trees and whatnots are overgrown in parts,make sure you’ve got glasses on to spare your eyes. Early lack of concentration almost saw me going over the edge,destroying my confidence and threw the rest of my uphill off. Uphill switchbacks were a bitch as they were deep with moon dust and not entirely sure how I could have handled this short,switchbacked rock garden without a trials bike!

The down: Somehow missed my connector to Surveyor’s Ridge,thus the ride ended up being just under half the distance originally planned. Ended up taking a slight diversion down for part of the ride and meeting back up with the original trail for the remaining 5-1/2 or so miles. Fun,flowy,good times on a bike with periods of that feeling of surfing,which is what I crave.

This creeper was handing out candy at the trailhead if you went in his van. Call Chris Hanson.

I need to move to Kansas or Oklahoma or one of those bible belt states. All my damn vistas up here get interrupted by these stupid volcano thingies.

Post-ride payoff #1: Maui Wowie ice cream at a local orchard. Note that for the most part the orchards up there charge more for fruit than you can get it at the grocery store for. Go figure,less value added,premium price.

Post-ride payoff #2: Grilled pizza with dead animal and dead vegetable on top

Jackson Day 4 thru…umm….the end

More pics/vids/verbs/nouns from Jackson,Driggs and surrounding areas. Overall had a great trip,even accounting for the fact that the drive was about as fun as taking a cheesegrater to your genitals. I would have liked to be able to fully disconnect (for the first time…ever?) and get more riding and flyfishing in but had to keep a life line to the outside world connected so I could handle some biz in the AMs and PMs. One day I’ll be able to take a trip with no wifi/mobile/computer….or so I tell myself.

After a week in the area I still stand by my initial 30 second impression,that Jackson is the type of place you go to hoping to get away from the type of people that live there. Like all mountain towns there’s an ‘under class’of amazing people that have made the lifestyle decision to (at least temporarily) eschew wealth accumulation for recreational opportunities –basically,my type of people. However,on first glance in the town all you see is what comes off as a (and I know it’s not as their history is deep) faux-western town crawling with people eating up carnival-esque ‘old time photos’and other bullshit. In the end I guess those kind of things help keep people in jobs,so it’s a necessary evil and I know you have to balance the good and bad,but I just can’t stand that all mountain towns have spent the past 15+ years in an arms race to scrape off all tarnish and other unique character in exchange for ‘village resort style living!’and ‘granite countertops!’ My advice is to stay on the Driggs/Victor side,or just drive up some forest service roads to camp every night and stay away from the towns at all!

Anyways,enough rants and onto the photos.

Sick bay window bus in Grand Teton National Park. Yes,I’ve got much love for VW busses of all years/body styles.

Ended up randomly meeting the couple that owns this bus on the trail (they’ve been on a ONE YEAR roadtrip from Canada!) and it’s pretty pimped out. Raby Camper Special engine and SICK homemade trailer. Would love the plans for this.

View from Taggart Lake in the park,only flyfishing I got in during the trip. I can say with 100% certainty this view doesn’t suck.

Hood ornament at JHMR.

I’ve wanted to ride this place since…8th grade? Was cool to finally see it,even if it was the offseason.

Best deal in the valley is the FREE trip up the gondola after 4:30 to a (near) summit bar that has buy-1-get-1 beers (aka $2.50 per) til 6PM.

View from gondola looking down on Bandit in the Jackson Hole bike park.

MOAR Bandit

A Snake River Pale Ale (decent,but I’d stick with their Pako’s IPA if given a choice) and view to the summit of JHMR

As we were 1/2 mile from the base of Snow King hit that up quite a bit for rides,climbing up part/all of Snow King depending on how I was feeling and exiting via Cache Creek. Wish that kind of riding was out my door here in Portland!

This is just part of the climb. Let’s just say you feel your sea level legs/lungs quickly.

This is what my legs thought the first day I did the climb

Finished the week in Victor/Driggs/Grand Targhee for the Wydaho Rendezvous,a mountain bike festival and fundraiser for the local Teton Trails and Pathways organization. Cool,well ran volunteer driven event that felt like a local rider family reunion. Demo rides,group rides,races and parties on Friday and Saturday nights,and a schwag raffle. Sadly was only able to make Friday’s festivities (broke myself off pretty good on my ride + had a wicked hangover courtesy of another newfound friend/TGR Mag Tye1On –aka wasn’t feeling the 9AM ride I signed up for),but demoed a Yeti SB-66 and went on a beautiful ride through wildflower laced singletrack with views of the Tetons with a new friend in who was kind enough to lead me around. Note that Grand Targhee starts around 8200 feet so bring your supplemental oxygen. If you get a chance to catch the Yeti Demo van when it comes to your town I highly recommend it,they had a gang of bikes ready to go and a SICK Yeti blue Dodge Sprinter.

Friday’s post-ride ‘office’

Corner office view. Call me CEO of the Grand Targhee.

Spotted a full on double rainbow all the way on my drive back to town! Still not sure what it means.

Back at Grand Teton Brewing for the Friday Wydaho party they had a bunch of stuff going on. Keg pulls,trials riding,beers,food,raffle,etc. My only feedback would be it’s too bad they can’t have everything up at Grand Targhee –kind of lame to have to drive down from the resort back into town for the parties,would be far better if it was all at the resort as they’ve also got camping there.

Trials. Oddly enough this guy went to college with one of my friends up in Tacoma. I kind of want a trials bike.

Black Canyon ride on Teton Pass. So sick! Sadly the GoPro died during the good part of the downhill so didn’t get any good footage. I’ll post what I did get later though. Was hoping to not get eaten by a bear as for the longest time was just me in this SICK downhill thru wildflower covered hillsides,stream crossings,rooted out trails,etc. So fun!

That last little bit of the ride was a bit tiring. Channeled my inner Andy Schleck solo breakaway that day.

Was super stoked to get back to the parking lot and chug some water and take in the views!

Jackson Day 3

Not feeling all that verbose,so just a few photos.

Sick Westfalia Syncro (4wd) with truck bed liner paint job

Vista

Was so windy it blew out a three burner gas stove

This ridgeline looked like it could be fun

One of the many reasons I like mountain towns

Untitled from Justin H on Vimeo.

Short vid of part of Snow King/Cache Creek ride. First minute is a touch boring.

Untitled from Justin H on Vimeo.

Jackson Day 2

After waking up to the below view from my tent was stoked on the possibilities of the day.

Rolled from Victor,ID over Teton Pass into Jackson. Cued up the obligatory Modest Mouse for the drive down the Pass. Chilled at a local coffee shop to get some work done,caffeinate and wait for the ladies to roll into town. Quickly realized that ‘the best coffee in Jackson’isn’t remotely as good as the 10th best coffee in Portland. Checked into the house that is holy shit no joke 50 yards from Snow King. Yeah yeah yeah,it’s the ginger stepchild to JHMR,and yeah there’s no bike park,but being able to go from garage to trailhead in 30 seconds = FKNA money! Did a short ride yesterday that reminded me oh dear God I love mountain towns and the fit girls that call them home. So many fit little ladies running the trails. Yum.

The altitude kicked my ass in a big way,taunting me like the trainers taunt the morbidly obese on The Biggest Loser. What parts of me the altitude didn’t brutalize the horseflies finished off –massive mofos with an apparent appetite for sweat. When you were moving it wasn’t too bad,but as soon as you stopped it was game on,dinner bell ringing,horsefly buffet line. Nuts.

Elevation profile of my short ride is below. Broken into two since my phone rang and turned the app off. Fail. The downhill was damn fun I’ve gotta say,nothing tech or crazy,just fun/flowy MTB goodness. Sadly there were no girls waiting to give me flowers and kisses afterward.

Snow King elevation

A few more pics from the day

View from the ride. That don’t suck.

View from Snow King

This bee somehow managed to wedge himself inbetween my spokes. Helluva way to go.

bee

Clackacraft drift boats use the tagline ‘Fear No Rock’. This boat was HAMMERED on the bow and split all over inside,though you can’t tell since my iPhone cam sucks.

clackacraft

A decent Kolsch from Snake River Brewing. Their IPA was pretty good,too,and a ~~6 pack~~ 4 pack resides in my fridge now. There’s hope for this town.

beer

Nothing epic thus far,but being able to pick up and work remotely from wherever is truly awesome.

TRIP REPORT:PDX -> Jackson Hole Day 1

Pulled into the Teton Valley area around 6PM last night after being on the go since 5AM (and being awake since 2AM –of course was too stoked to fall back to sleep). Long drive made longer by the fact that my Chewbacca had to cancel at the last minute leaving me to roll Solo like Han. Most road trips you have time to ponder all your inner thoughts and question past life decisions –‘Have I properly speced out my next big thing? Is that a gray or a blonde hair on my arm? Rework the algorithm? Should I have stayed with girlfriendABC? Wonder how my life would be different had I gone to Western and done their environmental science program? How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? If a XC rider goes off a 3′drop does that make him an all-mountain rider?’On this drive I had time to ponder everything twice,rewind and ponder again,like Groundhog Day in my mind.

Fairly uneventful drive. Worst part was running out of the coffee I made 30 minutes into it and not being able to find a coffee shop that was open for a few hundred miles. I remember when I was a kid coffee shops opened at hours where you need coffee,not 7AM,8AM,one place didn’t open til 10:30!?! How all the hipster coffee brands got big while subscribing to the hipster work ethos I’ll never understand.

On time departure with slight rain that stopped by Hood River
Subaru clock

Trusty co-pilots caffeine,sugar and music
Roadtrip copilot

Somewhere mid-Idaho we went from hot to nuclear and hit triple digits. BTW,driving thru Idaho is about as exciting as the WNBA draft,not much to look at. Picture the stretch of I-5 between Folsom and Bakersfield only 2-3x as long.

100 degrees in Idaho

Yup,bike is still there.

Rocky Mounts shadow

Mosquito farm

skeeters

Pondering infinity and parallel universes next to the campfire

Pondering infinity

Failed attempt at light painting ‘ride’. I was trying a candle lantern (aka couldn’t turn it off/on),MUCH easier to do with the headlamp I didn’t pack.

light painting

I love waking up to views like this. Those clouds dropped just enough rain that I got up to get the rainfly,but by the time I’d got it the rain had stopped and never came back. Meh.

view

No riding yesterday as when I rolled into town I had to satisfy the primal urge for a beer. Even the terribly mediocre IPA from Wildlife Brewing tasted like a million bucks after that drive.

A couple short ride reports

Not full reports as I’m not feeling too verbose as I’m a) overheating and b) busy as a one-legged man in an ass kicking contest,but wanted to post a couple short ride routes and quickly edited video from Surveyor’s Ridge. Still playing with the GoAm,I need to rig up a new mount,not feeling the handlebar perspective. Also not sure why this one came out pixelated as it’s the same quality level I saved it as last time from iMovie. Kinks:still not worked out.

The wildflowers are in full bloom in the Northwest so get out there!

Did this one a few times the past week. I’m calling this ride the lunch loop from here on out as it’s a short ride and a good midday pick me up.

You can see three (or four?) volcanoes from one part of the Lunch Loop. The Pacific Northwest is undisputedly the greatest place in the world in the summer. Also,the iPhone camera is undisputedly the most overhyped camera ever. Those blurry white lumps in the distance are (from left to right) Mt. St. Helens,Mt. Adams and the bottom pic is Mt. Hood.

Even though it’s 90 out there are muddy spots on the Lunch Loop. Note that if you lose your rear wheel traction around a muddy corner and body slam yourself into a blackberry bush that it WILL suck.

A short section of Surveyor’s Ridge. Ride was with WSMB so ride was about half as long as hoped.

Messing around with the GoAm. This video makes it painfully obvious that I’m a terror on two wheels and am turning down sponsors right and left so that I can keep living this rebel lifestyle. However,you can still offer up free bikes and gear,maybe JUUUUST maybe I’ll say yes to the right people.

Untitled from Justin H on Vimeo.

Two Quick Ride Reports:Forest Park Area

Distance: Not far,a touch over 7 miles on one and 11 on the other.

Weather: Typical early summer NW mix. Overcast,occasional pockets of sun,overcast again. Threat of rain on the second ride.

Short summary: Hadn’t been on the bike much outside of commuting lately so headed to the roads of Forest Park for a few light spins. Really digging the start from Holman as I like the uphill to jump start the ride. Took a Robert Frost-esque diversion on the first ride and found a path less traveled and had a blast (even if I did feel the need to check for ticks after). The second ride was just trying to get a workout in so I didn’t feel guilty missing muay thai on Tuesday (beginners night = teaching instead of getting a workout = lame). Was hoping to get 2k+ of climbing in but the rain looked like it was going to start at any second so bailed. Meh.

The up: Typical Holman road ascent on day one. Day two was typical post-rain Holman. Seriously,the slickest substance known to mankind resides in the dirt on those trails. Pretty sure Fox should abandon Kashima and go with whatever is in the dirt/mud there.

The down: The usual Forest Park descents,though day one with the new path was a blast. Pockets of fun interspersed with longer pockets of meh. Day two was a brake tester with all the mud and funk.

Ride summaries and a quick vid from part of day 1′s ride below.

Ride 1

Ride 1 elevation profile

Vid from part of ride 1 on the path less traveled. The dive at 5:15 in is a classic.

Untitled from Justin H on Vimeo.

Ride 2

Ride 2 elevation profile

Bonus ‘one eyed dog on a beach’photo that has nothing to do with these rides

A Week of Bike Commutes

Last week was the first week in awhile where I commuted 100% by bike. Except for a few issues (flatting out on the holy crap this feels different from the current day uberslack let’s talk about every half degree of head angle MTB scene pre-Millennium Falcon) everything was smooth and enjoyable,it’s actually faster to ride AND I get a nice warm up. Oh yeah,I also get the benefit of burning off half a beer each way,which is always nice. Note that I work from home so my commute consists of either riding to get coffee/coffee beans or just heading to the boxing gym so it’s not nearly as aggressive distance wise as many others. Basically repeat the below a few times a week.

Ride there

Ride back. Note this is slightly farther than ride there due to a diversion

What’s interesting about the entire thing (fat people,listen up here) is that even a simple commute like mine can help you see sustainable weight loss. Based on the ride estimates from my app each way burns ~180 calories. Doing that 5 days a week burns 1800 calories just DURING the workout,not including the metabolism boost you’ll get during the day. Given there are 3500 calories in a pound of body fat you’d see about a pound of fat loss every two weeks even if you don’t change your diet. That’s right,keep stuffing your gnarly Jabba the Hutt grill with taco bell and sodas (hey,it’s DIET soda!) and STILL lose a pound every two weeks. Holla at that big boned people!

Ride Report:Surveyor’s Ridge

Distance: Not far,a leisurely 10 miles

Weather: Sunny with an intermittent cloud early. Halfway point saw the wind kick up to where the clouds were moving so fast it looked like riding in a time lapse video.

Short summary: After last weekend’s attempt at finding a different trail resulted in almost running out of gas and turning tail to limp back to fuel up felt good to get on the trail. Wildflowers starting to bloom –seriously can you beat the Northwest at this time of year? Terrain started to change about halfway in from definitely western to hinting at eastern Cascades. Sign at the trailhead said recent bear sighting,but as it was gay pride parade day in Portland I figured any bears would be in the city. Good short ride that I’d do again if I had more time to go further.

The up: There wasn’t a ton of challenging uphill here,was mostly rolling terrain and gentle elevation changes. A couple rocky sections that resulted in getting off and pushing the bike through due to ridiculous pedalstrikes and riding Han Solo styley –didn’t want to break myself off with no one around.

The down: After a time check and turnaround the downhill was more apparent than the uphill –didn’t have to pedal much thru large sections of trail. Scenery went from wide open vistas and sidehill traverses to forested singletrack and back again. Great views of Mt. Hood. With the wind kicking up a lenticular cloud was starting to form over the peak. Had a nice pedalstrike on a rock around a corner kick me off the bike. Fortunately kicked me off to the right and not the left as it would have been a bit of a downhill roll otherwise!

Elevation summary

Just another wildflower covered scenic vista

Landscape started to change a bit halfway in

Lenticular forming

Same scene slightly wider

Quick vid I took of the wind after my pedalstrike to dismount

Pedal graffiti

Next time take a slightly wider line

Post-ride payoff

Ride report:Forest Park (Holman to FL1 to Saltzman to Germantown and back)

Wanted to get out and recreate and give thanks on Memorial Day. Figured what better way than to conquer the Germans* in my own little way by way of a ride to Germantown Rd.

Distance: Right at 20 miles

Weather: Sunny! Not that I could see any of it once I got into the canopy of Forest Park.

Short summary: Decided to try a new route after looking at the available options. Definitely a nice change of pace and scenery in the park,and by taking Holman avoid most of the Livestronging/Team in Training going on.

The up: Not really a lot of up on this ride,which was a bummer as I could use the workout. MUDDY! Wow. Holman does NOT drain well in parts,definitely dismounted and walked around to not destroy the deep spots. Nice steep climb to start off the day with some obvious muddy spots but also spots that appeared normal but were so slick that you literally spin your wheels in place.

The down: The ups and downs weren’t really that distinguishable from each other,outside of the last downhill from Saltzman to 30. Pretty much just a low effort spin otherwise.

Ended up having a post-ride Rocky Mounts rack megafail. Loaded the bike up and went to lock the handle down and had it shatter in my hands! I had been thinking the other day that they could use a better way to microadjust,that the point between too loose and unable to tighten was hard to adjust,but never expected the handle to break as I wasn’t putting a lot of pressure on it at the time. I’ll write it off as a one in a million issue and bring it back to REI and give them one more chance,but the metal handles on my buddy’s Yakima were looking pretty nice the other day…Finished the day with in the sun,cleaning and lubing the bike,sipping on Blind Pig from Saraveza.

Have only used the rack three times and the handle broke!

My not really trusty steed sunning itself

*No Germans were actually harmed

bicycles can save the world

RIDE REPORT:Dog River Trail

Jackson Day 4 thru…umm….the end

Jackson Day 3

Jackson Day 2

TRIP REPORT:PDX -> Jackson Hole Day 1

A couple short ride reports

Two Quick Ride Reports:Forest Park Area

A Week of Bike Commutes

Ride Report:Surveyor’s Ridge

Ride report:Forest Park (Holman to FL1 to Saltzman to Germantown and back)

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